Yesterday I wrote about how there are positives to be taken out of even the most difficult situations. I feel like every day there’s something new to be found that makes me thankful to be alive and fairly healthy. However, that doesn’t necessarily make things easy either. There are moments as a parent during this week that have, well, reminded me why I teach high school kids!
Now first, let’s talk about some positives. Walmart had a great selection today and I found some pretzel bread that was delicious. Who needs regular bread when you have pretzel bread? (Turns out, we need regular bread too. Oh well.) I bought a vacuum that was highly rated and also very cheap, which is good considering the state of our previous one.
We went for a couple of family walks today and timed out the weather very well. I was keeping an eye on radar this morning, and we got back from the first one about five minutes before heavy rain began. We also were able to go out right before it got dark. In between, we learned a little, I graded online work, and I also learned something about ocelots, which I wasn’t expecting.
Today I learned something else too. Rain shrinks our house. It’s like one of these magic tricks. As soon as it starts to rain, the living room shrinks in size by about fifty percent, the kitchen table barely fits in our kitchenette, and the stairs create far too little separation. When we are stuck at home for a long time, the challenges begin to mount. The kids seem to constantly run into the dog, or the dog into them, or maybe everyone into everyone. Suddenly there are tears and I don’t know where they came from.
Days like today are a real struggle. I know parents from coast to coast feel it. Back years ago when an Arizona summer day hit 115 degrees, I remember all the experiences of sitting with the kids wondering what movie we’re going to watch next. A soaking Ohio rain isn’t a whole lot different. The difference this time is that my wife and I are also doubling as homeschool teachers, and I am simultaneously trying to perform online duties as a regular high school teacher.
I don’t want to take back anything I spoke about yesterday. My problems are small in comparison to a family dealing with real sickness right now, and although money is tight, we have a fridge full of food and a cabinet that even has a few Oreos. Still, it is important to acknowledge that things are emotionally trying. My family is trying hard to get along, but constantly running into speed bumps as well.
I was about to start a negative paragraph earlier by saying “To be honest,” but I stopped myself. The truth is, all the positivity I’ve felt in the last few days is honest. I feel hope even when things look lousy. I feel joy even when the news is bleak. I’m more grateful now for the little things than ever before. Still, there are moments in the midst of this new schedule that are incredibly challenging. There were times in the last 24 hours where I even felt guilty for writing what I wrote yesterday because some of the positive vibes felt like forever ago. I’m feeling a little bit of a lot of things.
Long story short, to the person who is feeling positive right now, I’m so glad! I hope you can keep pressing on toward new family goals and individual accomplishments. Please tell me what you are aspiring for because I want to be a part of it! Your drive helps me stay driven.
To the person who is feeling really overwhelmed right now, I am with you! Let’s exchange stories over virtual coffee. I’ve got a couple stories to share, but probably not in mixed company.
To the person who is feeling a little of everything, well-let’s be honest and say that most of us are there. It’s hard to know how to feel when you are somewhere you have never been. Unless it’s your first time at Disney World. You probably know how to feel even if you’ve never actually been there. Unfortunately, this isn’t Disney. Heck, Disney World isn’t even open. This is what we get.
Please join me through the good stuff. Join me through the not so good stuff. Share your good stuff. We can do this, but we need help. Honestly.